I spent a lot of Friday crying - I've had a ton on my mind lately. Thursday, I found out that my friend Aisha had died, and two of my other friends aren't exactly at their pinnacles of health either. I'm also stressing out over my book because I still don't know how I can get enough money to hire the artist who has agreed to work with me. My dad said that he'll do the art for me, but honestly, he doesn't really have the time. My mum said that I have enough money right now to hire that artist. However, there are two problems with this. A) I don't want to start working with Kevin and find out halfway through that I actually don't enough to pay him. B) I can't afford to pay Kevin if I want to move to Toronto on my own, which I alsoreallywant. So, I do not know what to do! How can I do both? Ugh!
Getting Starkeeper published isso important to me- I know I have said this a lot, but it's true! I do not want my novel to become one of mymanyfailed projects that go nowhere. Plus, bullying is a problem, and I want to do something to speak out against it, you know? and I can with my book.
Aisha didn't take her life and neither did my friend Scott, however, I knew people who killed themselves. I wish I could've help through whatever they were going through. Like the lyric in The Fray's “How to Save a Life” that goes: "And I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known how to save a life." Now, I’m not saying that Starkeeper will eradicate bullying, solve all of the world’s problems and save thousands of lives. However, if my graphic novel can make a difference in someone’s life (even if it’s small), then I have to try and do EVERYTHING I can to get my book published.
Lastly, I watched a movie called Cyberbully on Friday that I want to share with you all. I think it has a really good message.
Before I was certain of how much it would cost to hire the comic artist, I had a dream. I dreamt that for my dad's birthday, my mum bought him stuff from an electrician store. She bought me a circuit board with incandescent light bulbs attached to it at the same time. She told me that its objective was for me to turn the lights on and off with my mind.
"Just like in Fringe!" I announced.
Mum figured that this would be very hard for me to do, so then I thought to myself that it'd be hard, but not impossible.
I think the point of this dream is to say, "hey, getting the money you need may be hard, but it isn't impossible." Also, perseverance seems to be a common theme in my dreams lately.
Starkeeper is very important to me, and I truly believe the quote in the picture. ==> One way or another, I will get the money and the resources to make Starkeeper a success!
Ever since I was little, I believed in the possibility of a better world - a sort of Utopia. I looked up to people like Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., Buddha, the 14th Dalai Lama and Jesus. I thought if they changed their worlds, why can't we change ours? However, as I got older, and began to the inevitable hardships of life, my belief was clouded over and got pushed into the back of my mind.
Until quite recently, I thought that until catastrophic happened on a global scale, or until some enlightened figure would step into the public eye, people wouldn't want to ban together. Though, as it turns out, I was wrong. A better world is possible now - change is possible now.
Kony 2012 is a documentary and campaign focused on bringing awareness to the child soldiers in Uganda, and Joseph Kony (the man responsible for them) to justice. www.invisiblechildren.com
Bully Movie (2012)
Bully is a documentary that chronicles the lives of young, bullied, American students and their families. thebullyproject.com
The It Gets Better Project
The It Gets Better Project was started by Dan Savage for LGBTQ youth, in response to strings of suicides due to all the homophobic bullying. www.itgetsbetter.org
These three videos are just a few examples of how everyday people are changing the world. This proves that we (the everyday person) can change our lives.
Today, I want to talk about bullying, and the importance of Starkeeper (my graphic novel) and living your dreams. Bullying is a real problem and one that I feel quite strongly about! This isn’t just because I have experienced it and continue to, but because millions of people experience it every day. According to a statistic released in 2010, there are about 2.7 million students being bullied each year. In response to this, I have heard many say, “high school sucks, but you’ll get through it,” or “people are mean to each other, but what can ya do?” I feel like the people who make comments akin to these, are dismissing this issue without giving it much credence.
Saturday night, I was chatting online when someone came on, and told me that I was going to be a lonely old guy because no one will want me. This didn’t hurt me, it just made me FURIOUS because it was bullying. It was cyber bullying, and NO ONE HAS THE RIGHT TO BULLY, PUT ME OR ANYONE ELSE DOWN AND TAKE AWAY OUR HAPPINESS.
People commit suicide because they see it as their only escape from their bullies. I have been there, but I am glad that I’m still here because now I have the chance to make my dreams come true. If I had gave in to all the naysayers and bullies I encountered, or if I ever do, I would be effectively letting them squash my dreams. No one has the right to stomp out anyone's dreams. Therefore, I vowed never give up on mine, and this is one of the reasons that it is so important to me that I get my graphic novel published.
Being published will help me create the life I want. It'll also prove to me and everyone else that I can do anything. However, another BIG reason is that Starkeeper is my it gets better message to people. I want to show people that perseverance pays off and dreams can come true.
Life can get better, but we have to make it better, and it's a process that might not happen over night. Also, we believe that we are worthy enough to have better lives
I want to say one more thing before I call it a night; if anyone wants to talk, I'm here for you. You can get a hold of me through Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr or email me at email@example.com.
So, I just watched Veronica's latest video, and wanted to share it. The story that she shares really resonates with me. I empathize with the woman (albeit on a different level) because I also don't like, need or want people's pity.
AAHHHHH! I'm so SICK of lying in bed all the freaking time, which it makes me wanna scream. It's extremely boring and unproductive, however, everything I tried to do, i.e. screenwriting, acting, modeling and internet marketing was short-lived. Even having an in-store job didn't work out. I am not saying I'm giving up on my dreams but for now, I have decided to become a book reviewer but no one is hiring, so I don't know. Bleh!
My theory was to start making money so I would be able to hire someone to take me places, and by writing reviews I'd gain exposure as well as credentials that could help me publish my book.
I so wanna scream and break through every obstacle that's in my way! You know those opera singers who can shatter glass with the power of their voices? That is similar to what I want to do. Don't you wish your problems can be solved by something as simple as a scream? However, life isn't that easy, thus it looks like my only viable option (for now, at least) is to go back to original plan of putting myself out there.
"Putting myself out there" involves internet marketing, but I stopped marketing because it got to be pretty overwhelming, and I could not afford the various fees that went with it. Furthermore, I don't own a credit card, and wouldn't be able to afford to throw money at stuff that was not fully reliable even if I did. Though, I'm still going to try to find ways to promote myself online, without needing products and services that I can't pay for.