Some of you know, I haven't been very happy with my current living situation, and have been exploring other avenues. I deal with a lot of the crap that goes on here, I mean, it's extremely frustrating, when people find dirty dishes in my cupboards on a regular basis, and being judged all the time for the stuff I do and/or don't do, but I deal with it. However, what I cannot deal with is this; ILC is making it really hard for me to get out and about with an attendant. So, working, and doing book related activities are a struggle because people at ILC think I'm not independent enough, and shouldn't require assistance for such things. Although I enjoy speaking, and showcasing Starkeeper, these tasks are part of my jobs. Furthermore, don't they realize that if I could do said tasks on my own, I definitely would?

Sadly, finding someone to assist me out in the community is not a new issue. It came up when I started modeling, which is one of the reasons why I put my modeling aspirations on hold, but I digress. One of the avenues that I've been exploring to remedy my issue is Direct Funding, which is a program that gives you a chunk of money each year to hire your own attendants. However, DF might not meet all my needs, and if I apply for it, I would be taking a risk because I don't know how or even if Direct Funding would work for me.

I don't want to stay where I'm not happy, but I don't want to put myself up a creek without a paddle, either. So, do I trust myself to make and/or find paddles when I need them? I don't know.